On Friday the 21st of April it was my birthday. I was going to the circus. it was an very existing day for me. when my mum was pouring my cereal she dropped a cornflake.At 3 :00pm I was going to the circus. The first act I seen was a lion tamer. The lion was giving the tamer a cuddle. The next act was acrobats they danced around the stage. The main dancer had a drum. I got to go on stage and danced too. It was such a great day and we had so much fun at the circus.
You have come up with an interesting way of using this week’s words, Abi – well done.
I particularly like your description of the acrobats dancing around the stage – it helps to create a clear picture in the mind of the reader.
Next time, try to use connectives to link some of your ideas and sentences together – it will make a big difference to your writing.
For example: Friday 21st April was a very exciting day for me because it was my birthday.
And remember: the past tense of see is saw, not seen!
Keep up the good work! I look forward to reading another of your 100WCs soon!