Category Archives: Uncategorized

11. Bananas are the best

Banana, banana, bananas are the best,
A nice squishy middle in a big yella vest!
Today or manyana, ah’ll be sayin ‘Can ah,
Can ah have a ba-na-na?’

You can use it for a fearsome gun – banana!
Slice it up and put it in a bun – banana!
It’s a lot of healthy fun – banana!
Can ah have a ba-na-na?

Banana, banana, bananas are the best,
A nice squishy middle in a big yella vest!
Today or manyana, ah’ll be sayin ‘Can ah,
Can ah have a ba-na-na?’

What am ah goin to have for ma tea? Banana!
Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, Thursday, Friday? Banana!
What’s ma Sunday dinner goin to be? Banana!
Can ah have a ba-na-na?

Banana, banana, bananas are the best,
A nice squishy middle in a big yella vest!
Today or manyana, ah’ll be sayin ‘Can ah,
Can ah have a ba-na-na?’

You can slide down a tree on the skin – banana!
Wear it on your head for a hat – banana!
Try and use a cokey-nut for that – banana!
Can ah have a ba-na-na?

Banana, banana, bananas are the best,
A nice squishy middle in a big yella vest!
Today or manyana, ah’ll be sayin ‘Can ah,
Can ah have a ba-na-na?’

10. Caledonia

I don’t know if you can see,
The changes that have come over me.
In these last few days I’ve been afraid,
That I might drift away.
So I’ve been telling old stories, singing songs,
That make me think about where I’ve come from.
That’s the reasons why I seem,
So far away today.

Chorus
Let me tell you that I love you,
That I think about you all the time,
Caledonia, you’re calling me, now I’m going home.
But if I should become a stranger,
Know that it would make me more than sad.
Caledonia’s been everything I’ve ever had.

Oh and I have moved and I’ve kept on moving,
Proved the points that I needed proving.
Lost the friends that I needed losing,
Found others on the way.
Oh, and I have tried and kept on trying,
Stolen dreams, yes, there’s no denying.
I have travelled hard,
with conscience flying,
Somewhere with the wind.

Chorus

Now I’m sitting here before the fire,
The empty room, the forest choir.
The flames have cooled, don’t get any higher,
They’ve withered, now they’ve gone.
But I’m steady thinking, my way is clear,
And I know what I will do tomorrow.
When hands have shaken, the kisses float,
Well I will disappear.

Chorus

9. Loch Lomond

By yon bonnie banks and by yon bonnie braes,
Where the sun shines bright on Loch Lomond,
Where me and my true love were ever want to go,
On the bonnie, bonnie banks o’ Loch Lomond.

Was there that we parted in yon shady glen,
On the steep, steep side o’ Ben Lomond.
Where in purple hue the Highland hills we view,
And the moon coming out in the gloamin.

O ye’ll tak the high road and I’ll tak’ the low road
An’ I’ll be in Scotland afore ye:
But me and my true love will never meet again
On the bonnie, bonnie banks o Loch Lomond.

The wee bird may sing and the wild flowers spring.
And in sunshine the waters be sleepin’;
But my broken heart knows, not the heather or the glen,
For it is blinded by the tears that I’m weepin’!

O ye’ll tak the high road and I’ll tak’ the low road.
An’ I’ll be in Scotland afore ye:
But me and my true love will never meet again.
On the bonnie, bonnie banks o Loch Lomond.

8. Flower of Scotland

O Flower of Scotland,
When will we see,
Your like again.
That fought and died for,
Your wee bit Hill and Glen.
And stood against him,
Proud Edward’s Army.
And sent him homeward,
Tae think again.

The hills are bare now,
And Autumn leaves,
lie thick and still.
O’er land that is lost now,
Which those so dearly held.
That stood against him,
Proud Edward’s Army.
And sent him homeward,
Tae think again.

These days are past now,
And in the past,
they must remain.
But we can still rise now,
And be the nation again,
That stood against him,
Proud Edward’s Army,
And sent him homeward,
Tae think again.

O Flower of Scotland,
When will we see
Your like again.
That fought and died for,
Your wee bit Hill and Glen.
And stood against him,
Proud Edward’s Army.
And sent him homeward,
Tae think again.

7. Fitba’ Crazy

You aa know ma wee brither, his name is Jock McGraw,
He’s lately jined a fitba club, for he’s mad aboot fitba.
He has two black eyes already, and teeth lost frae his gub,
Since Jock became a member o that terrible fitba club.

Chorus
For he’s fitba crazy, he’s fitba mad,
The fitba it has robbed him o the little sense he had,
It would take a dozen skivvies, his claes tae wash and scrub,
Since Jock became a member o that terrible fitba club.

The first game he took part in, I was there masel and saw,
There were jaickets for the goalposts and a tin can for the ba.
The Prince of Wales was there himsel, in his dinner suit,
Jock he passed the ball across, and shouted, “CHARLIE, SHOOT!”

Chorus

His wife she says she’ll leave him, if Jock he doesn’t keep,
Away from fitba kickin, at night time in his sleep.
He calls her Charlie Tully, and other names so droll,
Last night he kicked her out of bed and swore it was a GOAL!

Chorus

In the middle of the field at Hampden, the captain said,’McGraw,
Will you kindly take this penalty or we’ll never win at aa.’
Jock took three steps backwards, and shot off from the mark.
The ball went sailin over the bar and landed in NEW YORK!

Chorus

6. The Jeelie Piece Song

Oh ye cannae fling pieces oot a twenty storey flat,
Seven hundred hungry weans’ll testify, to that.
If it’s butter, cheese or jeely, if the breid is plain or pan,
The odds against it reaching earth are ninety-nine tae one.

I’m a skyscraper wean, I live on the nineteenth floor;
But I’m no’ gaun oot tae play any more,
‘Cause since we moved tae Castlemilk, I’m wastin’ away,
For I’m gettin’ one meal less every day.

Oh ye cannae fling pieces oot a twenty storey flat,
Seven hundred hungry weans’ll testify, to that.
If it’s butter, cheese or jeely, if the breid is plain or pan,
The odds against it reaching earth are ninety-nine tae one.

On the first day ma maw flung oot a daud o’ Hovis broon;
It came skytin’ oot the windae and went up insteid o’ doon.
Noo every twenty-seven hoors it comes back intae sight
‘Cause ma piece went intae orbit and became a satellite.

On the second day ma maw flung me a piece oot once again.
It went up and hut the pilot in a fast low-flying plane.
He scraped it aff his goggles, shouting through the intercom,
‘The Clydeside Reds huv got me wi’ a breid-an-jeely bomb’.

Oh ye cannae fling pieces oot a twenty storey flat,
Seven hundred hungry weans’ll testify, to that.
If it’s butter, cheese or jeely, if the breid is plain or pan,
The odds against it reaching earth are ninety-nine tae one.

Oh ye cannae fling pieces oot a twenty storey flat,
Seven hundred hungry weans’ll testify, to that.
If it’s butter, cheese or jeely, if the breid is plain or pan,
The odds against it reaching earth are ninety-nine tae one.

5. Dundee Street Songs

Eh’ll tell the boaby,
Eh’ll tell the boaby,
Eh’ll tell the boaby,
If ye lay a hand on me.

Sixty days in the tripe shop,
Sixty days in the tripe shop,
Sixty days in the tripe shop,
If ye lay a hand on me.

Muggie fell doon the mill dam,
Doon the mill dam fell muggie;
Muggie fell doon the mill dam,
And doon the mill dam fell …
Muggie fell doon the mill dam,
Doon the mill dam fell muggie;
Muggie fell doon the mill dam,
And doon the mill dam fell Muggie.

Johnny the barber shaved his father
Wi’ a roosty razzor;
The razzor broke an’ cut his throat,
Hurray for Johnny the barber!

There’s a mannie in yer loaby Mary Ann,
There’s a mannie in yer loaby Mary Ann,
There’s a mannie in yer loaby,
Ye’d better get the boaby,
There’s a mannie in yer loaby Mary Ann.

I like coffee, I like tea,
I like the boys and the boys like me;
I like to touch the ground,
I like to twirl around,
I like to play at…

One, two, three, a-learie,
I saw Mrs Beerie
Sittin on her bumbaleerie
Eatin’ chocolate sodgers.

Eh’m goin awa’ on the train,
You’re no comin’ wi’ me;
Eh’ve got a lad o’ ma ain,
An’ his name is guilty Jeemy.

He wears a tartan kilt,
He wears it in the fashion,
An’ every time he turns aroon’
I canna help fae laughin’.

Eh’ll awa hame tae my mother ah wull,
Eh’ll awa hame tae my mother ah wull,
She keeps a wee hoose at the tap o’ the hull.
An’ sells a wee drappie at tuppence a gill.

Eh’ll no’ bide wi’ my granny nae mair,
Eh’ll no’ bide wi’ my granny nae mair,
She skelps ma ja’ an’ she pu’s ma hair,
Eh’ll no’ bide wi’ my granny nae mair,

Eh’ll awa hame tae my mother ah wull,
Eh’ll awa hame tae my mother ah wull,
She keeps a wee hoose at the tap o’ the hull
An’ sells a wee drappie at tuppence a gill.

Five, ten, fifteen, twenty,
Time! Comin’ ready or not!

Meh lad’s a terry, meh lad’s a toff,
Meh lad can wear a hat,
Your lad can swank like that;
He says he loves me,
I know he does,
Meh lad’s a terry toff.

Wha wad like tae be a boaby,
Dressed in boaby’s claes?
Wi’ a sugarelly hat
And a belly fu’ o’ fat
And a tuppenny mealie pudding for a nose.

Vote, vote, vote for Neddy Scrimgeor,
He’s the man tae gi’ ye ham an’ eggs;
If ye dinna vote for him,
He will bash yer windaes in,
An’ ye’ll niver see yer windaes any mair.

Eenity feenity, fickety feg,
Ell, dell, dominell;
Irky birky starry rock,
An, tan, two’s Jock.
Jock oot, Jock in,
Jock jumped ower the heckle pin.
Jock a-mell, a-mell a-mower,
Ain twa, three, fower!

One fine day, a bonnie bonnie day,
I met my Auntie Mary;
She gied me a penny,
Tae buy whit I liked,
So I bocht a wee canary.
The wee canary flew awa’
Auntie Mary caught it;
She caught it by the tail
An’ flung it in a pail,
Cheeky Auntie Mary.

My mother said that I must go,
Wi ma faither’s denner-o;
Chappit tatties, beef and steak,
Twa reed herrin an’ a bawbee bake.

I went to the river an’ a couldn’t get across,
I paid ten pound for an auld dun horse.
I jumped on his back an’ his banes gied a crack,
An’ I had tae play the fiddle till the boat came back.

Come up an’ see my garret,
Come up an’ see my garret,
Come up an’ see my garret,
It’s a’ furnished noo.

A broken cup an’ saucer,
A chair wi’oot a leg,
A humphy-backit dresser
And an auld iron bed.

Eh’ll tell the boaby,
Eh’ll tell the boaby,
Eh’ll tell the boaby,
If ye lay a hand on me!

Eh’ll tell the boaby,
Eh’ll tell the boaby,
Eh’ll tell the boaby,
If ye lay a hand on me!

4. The Wee Kirkcudbright Centipede

The Wee Kirkcudbright Centipede, she was very sweet,
She was ever so proud of every one of her hundred feet.
Early every morning her neighbours came to glance.
She always entertained them with a beautiful little dance.

As leg number ninety four gave ninety five a shunt.
Legs number one and two were twistin out in front.
As legs numbers nine and ten were wriggling up the side,
Legs seventy three and four were doing the Palais Glide.

Her neighbour Jenny Longlegs with jealousy was mad.
She went out and bought herself a pencil and a pad.
She came a month of mornings and made a careful note,
Of every step the centipede made and this is what she wrote.

As leg number ninety four gave ninety five a shunt.
Legs number one and two were twistin out in front.
As legs numbers nine and ten were wriggling up the side,
Legs seventy three and four were doing the Palais Glide.

Armed with exact notation young Jenny Longlegs tried,
To dance just like the centipede, she failed and nearly cried.
She grabbed a hold of the centipede, she says ‘Now, have a look,
And tell me how you do these steps I’ve written in my book?’

Said the centipede ‘Do I do that?’, and tried to demonstrate.
She’d never thought on the thing before, she got in a terrible state.
Her hundred legs were twisted, she got tied up in a fankle.
She fractured seven shinbones, fourteen kneecaps and an ankle.

As leg number ninety four gave ninety five a shunt.
Legs number one and two were twistin out in front.
As legs numbers nine and ten were wriggling up the side,
Legs seventy three and four were doing the Palais Glide.

As legs number one and two were tied to three and four.
Legs number five and six were trampled on the floor.
Leg number fifteen was attacked by number ten.
Ninety seven and ninety eight will never dance again!

The Wee Kirkcudbright Centipede, she suffered terrible pain,
And some of us were very surprised she ever danced again.
But now she tells her neighbours, every one that calls to see,
Never try an explanation of what comes naturally.

As leg number ninety four gave ninety five a shunt.
Legs number one and two were twistin out in front.
As legs numbers nine and ten were wriggling up the side,
Legs seventy three and four were doing the Palais Glide.
Legs seventy three and four were doing the Palais Glide.

3. Three Craws

Three craws sat upon a wa,
Sat upon a wa, sat upon a wa,
Three craws sat upon a wa
On a cauld and frosty mornin’.

The first cra couldnae flee at aw,
Couldnae flee at aw,
Couldnae flee at aw.
The first craw couldnae flee at aw,
On a cauld and frosty mornin’.

The second craw wis greetin for his maw,
Greetin for his maw,
Greetin for his maw.
The second craw wis greetin for his maw,
On a cauld and frosty mornin’.

The third craw fell and broke his jaw,
Fell and broke his jaw,
Fell and broke his jaw.
The third craw fell and broke his jaw,
On a cauld and frosty mornin’.

The fourth craw wisnae there at a’,
Wisnae there at a’,
Wisnae there at a’.
The third craw wasnae there at a’,
On a cauld and frosty mornin’.

Three craws sat upon a wa,
Sat upon a wa, sat upon a wa,
Three craws sat upon a wa
On a cauld and frosty mornin’.

2. Coulter’s Candy

Ally Bally, Ally Bally Bee,
Sittin on yer mammy’s knee.
Greetin for another bawbee,
Tae buy mair Coulter’s Candy.

Puir wee Jeanie’s lookin’ awfie thin,
Just a rickle o banes covered ower wi skin.
Noo she’s gettin a wee double chin,
Frae sookin Coulter’s Candy.

Mammy gie’s me a thrifty doon,
Here’s auld Coulter comin’ roon’,
Wi’ a basket on his croon,
Selling Coulter’s Candy.

Little Annie’s greetin’ tae,
Sae whit can puir wee Mammy dae,
But gie them a penny atween them twae,
Tae buy mair Coulter’s Candy.

Willie gret baith lang and sair,
Till he got a penny tae share.
Noo he’s tumblin doon the stair,
Tae buy some Coulter’s Candy.

Ally Bally, Ally Bally Bee,
Sittin on yer mammy’s knee.
Greetin for another bawbee,
Tae buy mair Coulter’s Candy.