4. The Wee Kirkcudbright Centipede

The Wee Kirkcudbright Centipede, she was very sweet,
She was ever so proud of every one of her hundred feet.
Early every morning her neighbours came to glance.
She always entertained them with a beautiful little dance.

As leg number ninety four gave ninety five a shunt.
Legs number one and two were twistin out in front.
As legs numbers nine and ten were wriggling up the side,
Legs seventy three and four were doing the Palais Glide.

Her neighbour Jenny Longlegs with jealousy was mad.
She went out and bought herself a pencil and a pad.
She came a month of mornings and made a careful note,
Of every step the centipede made and this is what she wrote.

As leg number ninety four gave ninety five a shunt.
Legs number one and two were twistin out in front.
As legs numbers nine and ten were wriggling up the side,
Legs seventy three and four were doing the Palais Glide.

Armed with exact notation young Jenny Longlegs tried,
To dance just like the centipede, she failed and nearly cried.
She grabbed a hold of the centipede, she says ‘Now, have a look,
And tell me how you do these steps I’ve written in my book?’

Said the centipede ‘Do I do that?’, and tried to demonstrate.
She’d never thought on the thing before, she got in a terrible state.
Her hundred legs were twisted, she got tied up in a fankle.
She fractured seven shinbones, fourteen kneecaps and an ankle.

As leg number ninety four gave ninety five a shunt.
Legs number one and two were twistin out in front.
As legs numbers nine and ten were wriggling up the side,
Legs seventy three and four were doing the Palais Glide.

As legs number one and two were tied to three and four.
Legs number five and six were trampled on the floor.
Leg number fifteen was attacked by number ten.
Ninety seven and ninety eight will never dance again!

The Wee Kirkcudbright Centipede, she suffered terrible pain,
And some of us were very surprised she ever danced again.
But now she tells her neighbours, every one that calls to see,
Never try an explanation of what comes naturally.

As leg number ninety four gave ninety five a shunt.
Legs number one and two were twistin out in front.
As legs numbers nine and ten were wriggling up the side,
Legs seventy three and four were doing the Palais Glide.
Legs seventy three and four were doing the Palais Glide.

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