Looking behind me I saw a large run down castle. I started to walk very quietly, saying anyone home? No-one answered. I headed towards the big door. I reached out with my shivering hand. I tried to stop my hand from knocking on the door. The knock sent a long echo through the corridors. The door started to slowly but creakily open. I ran to the first set of rocky stairs and went to the top of the highest tower. As I looked down I saw skeletons walking slowly.
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Wow Ben isn’t that awesome writing . I think you are the best writer I’ve seen so far. You used really good descriptive words.
Ben, we really liked your writing. It made us feel like we were in that castle! Do you like writing about scary things? We want to read more of your work! 🙂
HI Ben. like your story really much.
This is a very interesting piece of writing which clearly is the start to a much longer story.
I’m going to show it to my class when we do story writing and see what they make of the rest of the story. It has some very good examples of adjectives being used to create a scene.