In one input a quote describing mathematics clearly stood out to me: “a problem-solving activity supported by a body of knowledge” (SOED, 1991, p.3). During my time at primary school I found mathematics very interesting. The notion that each question has a definite answer intrigued me. I liked the idea that stepping stones of investigation, guided us to finding the answer, which lead to us either being right or wrong. However, despite enjoying the subject, some factors of the mathematical lessons I received did create an anxiety towards parts of the subject within me.
To this day I still use my fingers to count, mainly surrounding my times tables. I distinctly remember back in primary 5 being asked “6 x 7” in front of my whole class. As I proceeded to count using my fingers I was told to sit down as “I should not be using my fingers to count at that age.” I have never understood to this day why using my fingers was a problem? As long as I got the correct answer in the end then there would be no need to humiliate me in front of the class like I had been. Therefore, creating a fear within me that I wasn’t learning in the correct way.
Until lately I never realised that my teacher was restricting my ways of learning. Going out on placement made me aware that each child learns in a different way and it is our job not to limit this. We need to explore different ways to teach a subject including maths. Again in primary I struggled very much with the concept of fractions. I just could not grasp an understanding of this element due to my teacher only teaching it in one way. As I moved up the school other teachers just assumed I knew fractions, so it was never went over again. Due to embarrassment I never raised the issue that I wasn’t sure what I was doing, as everyone else in my class seemed to get it. As I went on to high school I remember praying in maths class that the lesson wouldn’t be surrounding fractions and going on to university I only knew the very basics. Many people would think “what kind of student, wanting to be a teacher doesn’t understand fractions?” but it’s true. My mind was blank anytime they were mentioned. I then made it my own responsibility before placement to teach myself and find different ways to teach the children so they weren’t limited like I was.
In a recent lecture we were told the importance of developing a profound understanding of fundamental mathematics. Meaning we need to know the basic ideas before we build on to mathematical problems and this is where I feel my learning went wrong. Bruner (1964) created a scaffolding theory where we (the teachers) are the stepping stones of a child’s learning. They start at the bottom of the ladder learning the basics and as they become confident they move up a step. In my experience I feel I did not have a profound understanding of the basics and therefore was not ready to move on to the next steps of my learning. Despite having this negative experience with mathematics it has not put me off and I am eager to learn in this mathematical module. It has also made me acknowledge the teacher I want to become when teaching the subject myself.
