The Kirkhill Chatter

Kirkhill Nursery and Primary School, Rashierig, Broxburn, West Lothian, EH52 6AW

A sneak preview!

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Primary 5 are busy producing their best piece of writing for their Profile Jotters.  We have been working on ‘Journey of a Raindrop’ – with a focus on descriptive writing using adjectives, adverbs and strong verbs.  We also used the writer’s trick of personification to make our writing more engaging.  Next, we will look at the important step of editing our work for improvement.  But, here’s a sneak preview of some of the work that has impressed Miss Thomson so far (though there’s too much to include here!):

‘We evaporated into a small cloud which floated up into the sky and formed my own cloud.  As more of my friends floated into my cloud it got bigger and darker and I got angry.  Suddenly my cloud burst and we all started falling to the ground’ – Lewis D

‘I HATE heights!  So, very slowly, I peered through the clouds.  I was so scared!’ – Molly

‘The raindrop was 2km in the air and rushing down at 40 mph.  My raining buddy was a big raindrop, twice the size of me.’ – Lewis H

‘The blazing sun looked down at me.  I felt myself going up into the air, the water sparkled in the sun.  I was scared, really scared.  Finally I was in the clouds.  I was towering over the water like a plane.’ – Emma

‘The sparkly, soft, foamy marshmallow slowly inched over to me.  The warm, bright, flaming hot ball of energy (known as the sun) swept over me and instantly evaporated me.  I slowly drifted up into the cold relaxing air and casually passed into the giant white peach.’ – Blair

‘It all began in a stormy forest when I was in a puddle.  I had been in a puddle for 3 days and it was time for EVAPORATION!  My friends said it was scary so I was extremely scared.’ – Emilie

‘So, Rainy the Raindrop went through the roller coaster of a lifetime and she travelled through dangerous seas and big waves (and I mean BIG!)’ – Jenna

‘I’m going to the top of the ocean where raindrops like me go missing.  Into the sky!’ – Alexander

‘I dropped swiftly to the ground and had a look around.  The wind howled in my ears and ice hit my face.  Just then I saw a cottage – and a lovely little thing it was…’ – Amy C

‘When I was lifting, I saw beautiful crystal showery light, it was amazing!’ – Kasey

‘They were scared but not me (okay, I was a little scared) But anyway, we formed a big dark cloud and one by one we made it bigger and bigger.’  Emily-Louise

Well done, Primary 5!  What a bunch of amazing authors!

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