Having just had a lecture about families, I feel that at this point it would be worthwhile reflecting upon my own family experiences, and considering what that means to my teaching career.
To look at my immediate family, it is a clear example of a nuclear family. My parents were married 2 years before I was born and my sister three years later; I have all four grandparents around, all of whom were heavily involved in my life throughout my childhood… the list goes on.
My family seems very ‘normal’, and in the most practical sense it is. However growing up, other people often said that my family was different to theirs. My friends would come around and speak to my parents, seeming to like them more than they liked me! For a long time, I didn’t understand why people seemed to like being around my family so much, but now that I look at it from a more detached perspective, I do. My house was a happy house growing up, we laughed a lot and we were, and still are very close. My house was fun and relaxed and my friends felt comfortable being there and interactions with my family were always similarly lighthearted, and this was not always the feeling I had when visiting the homes of some of my friends.
Unusually, I also grew up for most of my childhood without a television. It seems like a much bigger deal than it really was, people – often adult friends of my parents – would visit and look around for one, ask us questions about how we ‘survived’ without one. People still ask me that now when it come up that I grew up without one, and it’s a tricky question to answer – we spoke to each other and enjoyed time together, such as meal times, perhaps slightly more often than other families seemed to do.
At 20 years old most of my friends seem to keep most things to themselves, but I am still very close to my family and tell them almost everything. It took me a long time to realise that this was unusual, and I was surprised to see how many others rely on friends before family for support. To me, the most important function of a family is to provide support to one and other, especially in times of difficulty. My family has proven on numerous occasions that they will do this, dropping everything to come to each others’ aid. I feel 100% secure in the knowledge that I could phone up any member of my family, including my grandparents with a problem, and they would solve it for me. It is a great feeling to have.
I think that there are two major points I would like to consider. Even now, despite my experiences with many different children, I struggle to understand households and backgrounds different to my own. I cannot get my head around parents who do things differently to the way that mine do or did. I understand that this is definitely a weakness for me, as it means that my thinking can often be very one-dimensional. Another point I noticed was the reactions of other people during discussions on the topic of family during the lecture. I noticed that not everyone was as open to discussing their families or backgrounds as I was, and this made me realise again, that not everybody has the same kind of family experiences that I have. In conclusion, I believe that I need to read a little on this topic, as I feel I have some knowledge gaps. I think that doing this will help me to gain a new level of empathy when discussing families and similar topics with people in the future, as I will have a better understanding of where other people are coming from in their beliefs, values and thought processes.
While looking up some ideas on this topic, I discovered an online quiz which made me further consider my own standpoint. The quiz was on the CBBC website and was entitled “Is my family normal?” it asked fairly simple questions about family, such as “How do you settle an argument?” and “What winds you up the most about your family?” and it came back as 6/6 normal. I re-took the quiz, putting in different answers, and got the same result – 6/6 normal. To me, this quiz was very significant, as it reminded that that any family is normal, even if it is completely different from my own. I think that this is a key point for me to remember, and always consider during any interaction with families throughout my career.
http://www.bbc.co.uk/cbbc/quizzes/normal-family-quiz
http://www.quibblo.com/quiz/2GuchYm/Is-Your-Family-Normal
My Family
