I had never heard the term ‘Mathsphobia’ before coming to university. Now that I have, I’ve realised that I have it, or at least used to. In high school math’s was the subject that caused me the most anxiety and upset and I never really knew why. I had never been terrible at math’s or found it to be hindering my learning but always had an overwhelmingly negative attitude towards it. This attitude carried all through high school where in my Nat 5 I had teachers telling me they couldn’t figure out why I thought of it so negatively to my higher where I fully decided maths was the worst subject in the curriculum.

However, until now I had never thought about where my negativity of maths may have come from. As we are spoken to about how heavily influenced a child’s attitude towards a subject is by their primary school teacher and family, I thought about my relationship with maths during my childhood. When doing this I realised where the hatred comes from. Growing up I not only had teachers who frequented the phrase ‘oh maths was never my thing’ but also had an older sister struggling with her higher with my parents not understanding it either. Being surrounded by maths in the setting made me automatically give maths negative connotations even though none of the situations have anything to do with maths itself rather than the individuals relationship with it.

After thinking about this it has made me rethink my attitude towards maths. During the maths workshop I have found myself to be enjoying revisiting and remembering old maths formulas, tips and tricks that I had previously forgotten which to me shows that my negativity truly was because of the setting I was in rather than myself. Reflecting on this has made me realised that in my teaching career I want to always ensure that my personal biases do not shine through my teaching but also push to try and dispel prejudices around subjects that children gain from those around them.